Today's rant - domestic violence and gold-diggers

I was just going to tweet about this, but I can't get my thoughts across properly in 140 characters. So I thought I'd rant on my very dusty blog...

This Johnny Depp / Amber Heard story is giving me the rage. I've just seen someone's (hopefully flippant) comment on Facebook that he can't possibly be guilty of violence (I was going to write 'domestic violence' but honestly, what's the difference?) because this person has had a crush on him for years. Oh right. So someone's level of attractiveness directly correlates to their ability to punch someone in the face, or intimidate them emotionally? Yes of course...

Then nosing around on Twitter, I see people comment that she's clearly made the story up to get money from him via the ensuing divorce. She's a 'gold-digger'. Yes of course - because she doesn't have her own money or career. And while she may have married him for the thrill of being with a high profile attractive actor who has the benefit of being rich, actually that's not a crime and many many people choose to do it, and their partners are entirely happy with that. Labelling someone a gold-digger doesn't make the fact they've been bashed around the head with an iPhone ok.

Someone else commented that it's her right eye that's bruised, and Johnny Depp is right-handed so it must be a fake injury. Because of course, she would have been sure to stand front-on when met with violence...

Another comment I saw was that 'well he was never violent in his previous marriage, and that lasted a really long time, so it has to be made up'. Do you know what? Some women choose to put up with (domestic) violence. Crazy as it sounds, some women blame themselves for their partner's angry behaviour, or they choose to keep quiet for the sake of their children and lifestyle, or wish to preserve their dignity over having their private lives splashed all over the world's newspapers and gossip mags (or the school playground rumour-mill, depending on their level of 'fame'). Also, living in rural France isn't anywhere near as intense as the media microscope of LA. So just because it hasn't been reported in the media in the past, doesn't mean it didn't happen. Or an alternative perspective is that different people bring out different reactions - it doesn't mean that they're not incapable of being violent. It depends on who or what 'pushes their buttons'. But button-pushing isn't a justification for violence.

I'm not saying that Johnny Depp is guilty of violence. I wasn't there. But reading the detail of Johnny Depp's behaviour in the restraining order posted online, I recognise all those traits. The traits of someone who has a lot of people telling them how amazing they are, when actually on a day to day basis, they can be just as rubbish and insecure as us 'normal' people. And the combination of those two things can be quite explosive. But that's another blog post...